Loneliness from an excess of self-love

At the other end of the spectrum is an excessive love for yourself. Staying in self-obedience, you will be naturally surprised to find that some daredevil decided not only to admire from afar, but also to show feelings – an act worthy of leniency and perhaps a couple of dates. Dad and mom said you were a star, and that’s true, but so be it, you’ll make this bastard happy with your attention.

Or maybe because of the long sadness of being alone with yourself, the confidence in your own worth is a bit of a blowing. Missing the admired eyes in which you could be reflected, you gave weakness, forgetting the criticism, whims and bias. But it wasn’t for long. For a serious relationship, you need someone in the big leagues.

What should I do then? Turn on your imagination

You approach a relationship with a well-trained worldview, rather than the fantasy of looking at a potential partner. That time alone is not counted years, it’s time to uncover the imagination – the ability to look at another person with a positive anticipation, understanding and curiosity.

What comes to mind when the fantasy is not involved:

  • Of course, he’s smart and he’s even cute. Although his nose is just huge. No.
  • He’s an engineer, which means he hardly knows art. It’s not going to work.
  • Ha-ha-ha, what an impossible accent. No, he’s not for me.

What do you see when you turn on your imagination:

  • It’s obviously pumped, it’s a bodybuilder, but it’s witty, which is rare among beauties.
  • The profession is not impressive, but he has so many interests! He’ll have someone to walk around galleries and flea markets with.
  • Looks too formal and a little nerdy. I wonder what abysses will open up in him if it comes to sex?

Training your imagination means encouraging sensitivity to unobvious things. Looking into the face of the person you are talking to, a colleague or passerby, guess/fantasize what might be attractive in a person who is so easily criticized by habit. The practice of imagination is not a compromise, but the key to a relationship. The ability to think creatively is a vital skill in a long-term relationship that helps to avoid tripping over the obstacles and trials that come with true love. 

There are always circumstances that prevent you from leaving your loneliness. But if you soften your aggressive selfishness and the destructive power of self-satisfaction, lack of parties on your schedule or registration in a mountain village will not prevent you from finding a life partner.

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